Today there will be no whistles or bells however, there will be a call for action to all families. An action lost long ago, creating a divide that continues to grow today. This is lost family connections.
One inevitable truth, a truth that is not hidden is the one we are all going to grow older. More truth is families will lose connection in life at some point simply because that is where life takes us.
Genealogy has taught me of connections lost. Hard lessons learned reading decades old letters, written by ancestors who lost connection only to throughout time attempt to rebuild them. I have personal experience in both. Both in discovering how our family lost connection and in losing the battle to regain those connection.
For this part of the journey I have Anna (Lynn) Bentley’s story to lead the way.
Anna is an unknown in history. Unknown not only to history as a whole, but unknown to me and my mom along with many other family members. Slowly in this fifteen plus year journey it becomes more clear where connections were lost. Also it becomes clear others have tried to re-establish the connection only to meet the same fate to carry on the lost connection.
In a undated letter written some time ago, addressed to “The Decendants (sic) of Erwin Bentley”. Hugh Keenan writes:
“…around 1950s my grandmother heard from Erwin Bentley the son of Anna [Lynn] Bentley...”
Consider the time was 1950s. This was soon after Erwin Bentley and Helen (Petrželka) Bentley moved their family to Tomahawk, Langlade County, Wisconsin and opened a restaurant. He somehow found out how to contact is Aunt Mary wanting to reconnect.
Hugh passed away sometime in 2007. My cousin Dean “Buddy” came into possession of this letter after losing is father, my Uncle Dean. Sometime just before Hugh Keenan passes away, Buddy goes to Newfoundland to meet him so reconnect this family. It wasn’t until July of 2022 I came into possession of a copy. Fifteen years passed from when opportunity was there to reconnect with long lost family.
Who knows how much time passed between a 1950s letter written by Erwin. I can only assume the last contact from this family was in the form of a letter in 1926. Although one hopes this much time could not possibly pass between lost family members; the time is much greater than I have mentioned so far.
Hugh also wrote:
“In 1892 for reasons which I have have not yet discovered, Ellen Lynn and her four younger children returned to Ireland.“
Since 1892 the Lynn family had sporadic communication. That is 131 years this year.
Each of us I am sure wants to think 131 years is an exception and not the rule however, I find it to be the normal in this family.
Albert Bentley is the start of another lost family connection in our genealogy. Albert passed away in 1883. He arrived in the Town of Waupaca, Waupaca County, Wisconsin in 1860. Through the years connection with his family in Alleganey County, New York carries a lost family connection for 163 years. Thirty-two years longer than the Lynn family albeit this connection was just across the states.
Today after 15 plus years of research adding the availability of information, I’ve not found one connection to either of these two families.
Lost family connections means lost stories of the lives of our ancestors. It means no family connection in both the present and the past.
Remember, questions are like many other things. Just because you don’t ask the question it doesn’t mean the question is not there, however it means you have not asked it.
I have tried to build family connections with every branch of this family. I will continue to try. We are connected by blood and our lives were impacted by choices our ancestors made. We owe it to them to tell their story, their history and share our parts of the story with each other. Sharing will mean more finally asking the questions.
For my family and others reading. Each of us have something from the past. However unimportant it is to you, please remember it is important to someone you know today. Even more importantly these treasures are of utmost importance to our ancestors.
I continue and strive for a day when cousins can put aside a few minutes of their hectic lives to share treasures they have. Not on Facebook, but to send it directly in full resolution.
As proven there are letters around, exchanged years ago some of us have. Waiting to find the matching mate. Letters I have discuss letters they wrote to the author of the letter I read. Someone out there, whether in a lost family connection or even an existing connection where information is not shared; exist. They seek each other to give us the story of our ancestors lives.
Even sharing of verbal memories gives someone like me hope that one day I may be the one who finally breaks our families lost connections.